Every time I kill time by playing computer games I could be writing drivel here instead.  Often think of things I'd like to write but they pass off into the ether without taking hold - which might be a good thing!  Suppose what's prompted this entry after more than a month of silence is a dream last night in which my father informed me that he was reading my journals.  My old journals.  I told him that perhaps it wasn't a good idea.  Those old journals are full of sex, drugs and rock and roll, well, not rock and roll I preferred classical music even then but there was definitely sex and drugs.  It didn't seem to bother him.  He was driving, fast as usual, down some night cloaked rain slicked city street taking people to a party.  I was in the back seat and climbed into the front after we'd dropped them off.  (Did I want to stay at the party?  Went and had a look but it was all 30-somethings.  Did like the ancient white aga with decoupage butterflies however - and the room full of everyone's shoes).  I and my Invisible Companion managed to find ours and rejoined Dad at which point the I.C. disappeared.
     The random thoughts are things like a) I bought a packet of eye makeup applicators, little double ended sticks with sponges on the end, and thought, 'these will see me out' meaning I'd be dead before I ever wore out five of the buggers and b) Death is more or less a constant companion now.  Not in a morbid or fearful way, it's just a part of my mind map.  I'm no longer immortal like I was as a youth.  There is a definite end in sight made more real by the death of my uncle on my birthday and the death of a neighbour at the young age of 51 of cancer and c) the world and all its dramas sometimes seems more like a stage set where we can act out every and anything we can think of.  Prem Rawat asked why people needed to go to the movies.  Around us was suspense, adventure, drama, pathos, humour and tragedy (my adjectives, his idea).   He's right of course.  Syria is on self-destruct, as is Egypt.  The climate change summit at Doha is again doomed because money is more important than survival and our politicians are no better than we are or we wouldn't allow this farce to continue.  There's a part of me that takes this all very seriously and another part that says, wow, how interesting!