My tv went on the blink Friday night.  I was watching some movie with Jack Nicholson, Keanu Reeves and Diane Keaton.  There were a few just for (some hard earned) laughs of Nicholson's backside in a hospital gown.  It was a predictable rom com well below the talents of the the actors. 

Texted friends the next morning to see if their tvs also had 'check the cable' and 'weak signal' problems.  Nope, just me.  Got on the roof yesterday (took two attempts, allowed fear to whisper, 'what if you fall?) to check the aerial and cable.  Nothing obviously wrong.  There's a small tv on the wall in the kitchen experiencing the same problems so the trouble is not confined to one television. 

So after doing all I could reasonably (and cheaply!) do on my own I thought/realized it's a sign.  I want a new life and what better way to start than severing the umbilical addiction to television!  What did Stephen King call it?  The glass tit or something similar.  If I have to watch something I can use the computer or dig out one of numerous DVDs. 

For years after I came to Australia I didn't have a television, just a radio.  I read and painted, listened to music.  That's a good use of time and a stellar use of my remaining time.

No visit with Richard yesterday as I left making the appt too late so save for feeding the horses, I had no obligations.  Thought I'd go see the sea but it was dark, rainy and cold and the idea of a biting wind and salt spray wasn't attractive.  Rather I took Mikaela to Dallis Park.  She hasn't run free offlead for months.  I had my gum boots on after slopping through the mud to call the horses so was ready for the marshy areas.  The path runs parallel to the Tweed River.  One side the river, the other pandanus palms, strangler figs, looming black bean trees, elephant ears and ferns; a rainforest microcosm. 

As I walked this delicious feeling of freedom came over me.  No one knew I was there, I didn't have to be anywhere, I wasn't expected anywhere.  I didn't have to report to anyone, divulge my itinerary, explain, ask or argue.  I just went and stayed and left at a whim.

How lightly wears a whim!  Shackles I didn't know I had dropped away.  Yes, today appts again, things to do, places to be, people to see and it's all fine but even so, even so.....